okayy. this is going to be a serious post. for the fisrt part mostly.
i have no idea whats happening to me. i'm not even sure if some of my friends can recognize me anymore. i for one barely know myself. i dont have a aim. a clue. dont think i'm enjoying what i've become. i cant help it. circumstances are not ideal. when are they ever. i miss some parts of my life that i know are over. but i cant go back. i'm out too far. i'm sorry if i've let you all down. i really hate myself for that. i'm surrounded by people, friends. but i still feel like the only person in this world. and when i drink, it all comes out. ihateit.
my new life is crazy. but i embrace it. cause it lets me forget. forget what i lost. forget what i dont wanna feel.
to all who feel like you dont know me anymore. sorry. you all are impt to me. do i still matter?
i know everyone has their own shit to go through. no one has time to listen to other people's shit. so i'm not gonna freak if no one bothers to reply me. but i just wanna know if i'm as alone as i feel. am i?
to those who i've been around with. i know i can be a mean bitch most of the time. like some poison. sorry too. just put up with me. becos you guys are what i have left.
i can deal with my family, my school, my life, but if i dont have my friends. i wont know what to do.
i'm slipping away from everything i love.
sorry ;if i've forgotten you ;if i've been a bitch ;if i dont seem to appreciate you ;if i've been selfish.
i just want you to know that i love you all. even if it seems like i dont.
spoke at : 7:00 AM
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